Choosing to be powerful.

I decided to take my thoughts to a deeper level.  What does it mean to birth a new archetype?

For years now I have heard the voices of many women, they have been claiming for themselves change. They call it forth in their prayers, they speak of it in their circles and write about it everywhere. We are changing aren’t we? It is so much more than a change in dynamics it is a shift of consciousness. There still may be those archetypes of old, the one that comes to mind is that old commercial where the woman is being super mom. She is “bringing home the bacon and frying it up in a pan”  There is actually some current commercial replicating  that…mom is doing laundry, flinging cookies and treats to her kids while they watch tv and smiling through the process…let’s get real. None of us do that.

We are doing the juggling, we are earning $$, we are quite possibly even baking cookies…but there is no one single image of woman now adays. We have taken on so many faces that a singular image is impossible.  However, what I do recognize in the women that I see, know and communicate with is  a collective role in change. We usher it in through all of our conversations, our actions and the dreams and visions we have for each other. Change…what does that look like?

I have often thought…if we as a race of people…the female race….were to rise up and speak our true voice that it would literally shift the planet on its axis. That collective voice that longs for peace, knows that love is far more powerful than fear, knows that letting go and letting god is a journey not a destination and asking for help is paramount to survival, but dependance is the road to destruction…these truths we speak to each other in our numerous circles throughout the world, in the privacy of our own meditative spaces and in the air waves of cyberspace we speak these truths to each other. What happens, I wonder….if our collective voice begins to be heard? Because…in case you haven’t noticed the shift…I think it is. I believe we are channeling a new vibration of hope and wisdom. Of peace and love.

Yes, in the difficult moments of strife in our individual lives we might find the opposite to feel true. The weight of financial stress, jobs lost, health crisises, familes stressed…inside the plight of a world out of balance we might not feel this wave of change so clearly. But often, it is in the constriction of “what is” that we find it within ourselves to know what is possible.  It is in the dark moments when we reach for the light switch that we can trigger that change.

Our choices are powerful as women. Our influence far greater than we know. I am always pleading with my children….telling them, especially my daughter, that they are powerful beings. And please, use those powers for good. I say that to you as women, use that power that is inately yours and change the world. You don’t have to take up the torch and lead the pack and gather the energy to do it all alone. You see, that is the old way. Know that even in the small choices you make, the choices you make day to day…to love, to trust, to vision a healthier future for yourself and your families…those choices affect us all.

That is the thread that weaves the fabric of this new female archetype. Every choice to stay out of martyrhood, to stay out of victimhood, to love with boundaries, to trust life and the process of a greater love, to be abundant in your own existance. These choices are far reaching.

A new female archetype.

photo by Matt Zavadil.

I am thinking about a new female archetype. She is unfolding, I know right before our eyes. Many of us have been crafting her with our finely tuned instruments of growth and pursuits of wisdom. We…the collective voice we, the female voice that speaks from the hallows. We are an expression of a greater truth and we seek in oh so many ways to express these truths. We have found patterns and symbols to help us along the way.

An archetypal energy is contrived of the experiences of life. Those experiences that we have over and over and we weave them in and through our stories until they seem to have a life of their own. An archetype like….mother. We don’t need to struggle to summon up an image to match that metaphor. We have our beliefs, attitudes and individual stories that have emblazoned the energy of mother deeply into our souls. There are other female archetypes that have marked our paths and spoken to us through the wisdom of their experience. Queen, Princess, Goddess, Seductress, Nurturer, Healer….there’s even an archetype for women of different cultures and different generations. We’ve given enough collective energy to these roles in our lives to sustain them over time. They will always be available to us to embody and use for our purposes.

Today there are new “versions” of women. The archetype of a woman of the new millennium will be one that has her power. She is trusting of the knowledge of the women of old and aware how to use it. She is no longer dependent upon a male for survival but has learned to exist in co-creative partnership with them and all of life. She will call herself mother or daughter or friend but will not identify herself as such. Her identity goes much deeper, her connections to the cycles of time and season shape who she is far more than the roles she plays in life. She is a blend, almost ageless of the three faces of the goddess. Maiden, Mother, Crone….no longer living in separation from these other parts of herself, but dancing amongst them letting each facet shine in its appropriate time.

I know these new energies are not being forged easily. I hear you…..women…..I hear your struggles and your sufferings and the challenges there are to ushering in this new archetype. You are erasing the old ways of taking care of everyone else before you give to yourself, you are erasing the story of dependency upon our traditional roles of the past. You are teaching your daughters to believe in their unlimited possibilities, you are raising your sons to love openly without fear.  You are learning, teaching and living that abundance is an expression of love that you allow yourselves.

We talk a lot amongst ourselves about a new energy coming. What we often forget to do is stop and take stock of our contribution in calling it in. We are the thing we are waiting for. Look around into the eyes of your sisters….it isn’t just coming…it is here. We are shaping what the future will define as a woman of power. A woman self directed and balanced. Gracious women. Thank you for your divine contributions.

Promise me a spring time…

Its a time of year when things come to an end. The sun moves deep to the horizon and clouds nestle us in. Cold and damp replace the bright warm sunny days we love so much. Out in nature animals have been preparing for what lies ahead. Bears go to hibernate, birds flock to warmth and food has been stored. We aren’t so different. We’re just un-aware. We are suppose to be slowing down, going within, taking a rest from the hectic days of sunlit skies. Listening to that inner call can be our key to coming out the other side, bursting into springtime with lots of energy.

This time of year the Sun shifts into Capricorn. While here, life can look a bit more serious. We start thinking about goals and productions of a new year. It’s important tho to take the time to dive inside and think things through. Take the message of the Solistice, go within and let die what must die. Be prepared to let things go. I’m recognizing that we are moving into a heavy dose of Capricorn. Pluto, our teacher of deep soul change has settled into this sign for a nice long stay. The enlightenment that we experienced with Pluto in Sagitarrius will give way to giving attention to how to share our resources, to use that awakened awareness for a collective transformation.

The Sun joins Jupiter, Venus and soon enough Mars as it moves through. It will move on but leave behind most of this energy for us to play with. Take this time and do the things that Pluto and this Winter Solstice ask of you. It will pay off in months and years to come. Use your inner power to visualize a future, to see a collective goal that can make this journey far more than we have yet imagined.

Pluto has a significant role in the changes we can implement. The catch with Pluto has always been that sometimes we are afraid of letting go and Pluto’s mantra is let die what must die! It is within the process of death and rebirth that transformation occurs. Capricorn is the place in astrological order that we expand our awareness beyond self and intimate relationships to society. Our vision widens and we have the opportunity to look beyond our selves and include the beginnings of the whole.

It seems what might have to die here is a belief.

Belief for a Capricorn, work hard, please everyone and when it comes to a world view its a view of dominate or be dominated…control or be controlled. Who’s the biggest or the best. How do I get mine?

With Jupiter and Venus lending a flow of positive vibes as we start on this decade of Pluto in Capricorn we can use this energy to focus a more conscious view of the world. The awarenesses gathered in Sagitarrius throughout this past decade are the very wisdoms that can guide us through the next. Messages that have begun to appear on our horizon might just be the norm as we travel together through our collective future. Messages of community, shared resources and conscious change. We will be presented with the lessons of dominion, of harmony within our societies.

We will be asked to share our gifts.

What will we contribute?

Exploring a new language, the language of my soul.

I know my words govern the expression of me into form. The power behind them has significant magnitude. With each piece of information that I give value and substance my humanness takes form. It seems, these morsals are a tool for the sculpting of my experience. Today, after a weekend of dancing a workshop with 5 Rhythms teacher, Amara Pagon, I seek to make sense of what it means to me “Embodied Soul” was the purpose of our journey on the dance floor and it held all that it implies.

As the days unfold I’m working on a premise that when I am in “alignment” with my soul there is an alignment of my head /thoughts, my heart / feelings and my body /greater conscious mind. And that alignment is how I can touch and know my soul. It is a bridge that connects me from my physical world to my spiritual essence.

After a weekend of moving my body to give what I usually can’t put into words some expression, I find myself wanting to create for myself a new language. I recognize that my inner story is one that contains a lot of chapters about what is and what is not. The judgments I make about myself, about others and about the world around me tend to surface in limiting imaginations of the almost possible. Its part of my humanness I think. I’ve met few people that don’t experience similar feelings and challenges. It must have to do with developing our ego, too bad we abuse that so much.

Listening to that language and focusing on what my head is saying to my heart occurs for me on the dance floor. I move my body and something happens. I begin to observe myself with more truthful eyes. Each layer of me unfolds and I subscribe it a language. But, I find often that language has been critical with too many edges.

These thoughts roam around in my head so much that its easy to believe them.

I can’t…

I don’t…

I’m afraid to…

what if???

And so, in search of another way to move into greater depths of freedom I am becoming aware that the language that I have is not the one that brings more love and freedom into my life. So my head…in search of its contribution to my path seeks now a way to merge and flow. To stop drawing harsh, bold lines with my ego and let circles and spirals emerge. Aligning my head with my body and my heart has begun when I notice my thoughts turning to something more truthful, with substance.

The journey from head to heart can seem a long a treacherous path. The releasing of ego doesn’t tend to come easily with out struggle. Decisions, choices, intentions that are expressed by a wounded or out of control ego can shape a very limited reality.

However, a nurtured and loved SELF with a language of acceptance and trust? Well, that is the language of my heart that I can shape and mold my life and produce luscious results. An ego or self that is directed to a language of purpose, hope, trust and love will ultimately contribute to a reality that holds all of the same. Taking those elements that most naturally are born in our hearts allows that ego to be more healthy and more whole. Even just the resonance of such words gives the heart a nudge towards alignment. Wow, that’s so easy. It seems.

Me, I pour myself in sweat and tears onto dance floors to take the journey from my head, to my heart, into my body and beyond. But, I know, we are all on the journey, however we find the path. The key, the important thought here is that we are willing to take it. For in there lies the path of soul. Deep, rich, fertile and alive! In the journey from head to heart, from heart to body we can uncover a great pathway unlimited only by our imaginations.

Today, I promise myself a new language. The one of soul that soothes rather than wounds. That inspires rather than controls. That provides freedom over limitation. The language of my soul is the language of my mind, my heart and my body pulsing in unison and purging the delicious results.

Scorpio and the power of women.

The transits of the Sun and the Moon are something we might take for granted each day. We rise and expect the sun to rise with us. We gaze up to the moon each night and note its shape:sliver, crescent, full circle… we note its light or absence in dark. I’m learning, the older I get I grow more sensitive to the subtle changes represented by the planets and luminaries. It’s as if the lessons they hold bring an even greater wisdom than before. I would even go so far to say that I am much more sensitive to the energy itself as much as the lessons unfolding. My body cycles through clear and evident transitions and transformations along with the fullness and darkness of the moon and the shifting of the seasons. It draws me to take a close look at this one. These last two days of the Moon entering in Scorpio joining the Scorpio Sun have felt like an ocean wave pummeling me towards the shore. My awareness is heightened and my need to be alone overrides all other.

Scorpio is the time of year from October to November when we are drawn to change. Cleaning out closets, organizing and re-prioritizing seem to be forefront on our minds. We metaphorically try to find ways to shake loose of our excess and discard the dead parts that must fall from the proverbial trees of our lives.

Scorpios lessons are of power. How to attain it, how to be integral with it. How to use it wisely and for purposes of “good.” There are degrees of understanding within Scorpio and I am suggesting that with age comes the opportunity to explore its depth. In youth we must search for our power, as women we look outside of ourselves to find the authority we feel we need. We feel the “power” our physical bodies possess and assume its limitations, negotiating for it and at times giving it away. In our middle years as wives and mothers we often find power in our ability to give and support life. We nurture and give to others often selflessly and we know, many end up depleted and often empty. These are necessary aspects of growing and maturing. The lessons learned through self-reliance and self-nurturing bring about the empowerment we seek.

In our aging years there is a deeper sense of power that comes from knowledge and wisdom. It is the power of the magician. In the past we might have called them witch, sorceress or priestess. Today I call it magician. And it is the power that lies within ALL women. Our true power is our ability to act. To make things happen in alignment with our visions. To dream things into reality from our imaginations. In these years of going within and seeking the wise counsel of our inner crone we are capable of incredible things.

Scorpio is the cauldron of magic. The place where transformation occurs and the elements unite. Ruled by Pluto, the symbol of our greatest changes, change we must. Change is integral to future growth. Without the balance of death and decay nature cannot exist. We see it in the leaves as they drop to the ground. In the skies as the light grows increasingly lower touching the horizon. We feel it in ourselves as we naturally begin to focus on releasing and letting go. We feel compelled to brew something, be it a little apple cider or a fabulous new idea.

In our youth we might not notice so much the changing skies as we move from day to day. We do find ourselves responding as the seasons change or to the fullness or emptiness of a night time sky, often less tangible. The energies are subtle, the teachings more evident in our daily living. Even the messages the body sends in response to those changes can often go unnoticed. Our attention so fully captivated by life and often by survival There are so many things to occupy our minds while we are young. Our bodies are full of energy to reproduce and everything we need to care take the results. We bind ourselves to the tasks of sustaining the lives of those we care for and often have created. So much energy goes into these times that we are quite often unaware that we are being so greatly affected on a physical level by transitions of day into night or months into seasons. The new and full moons usher in energies to grow and change. Seasons slip in sometimes gently sometimes with great force. Our responses while we are in that state of survival are instinctual and automatic.

The overpowering wisdom of our bodies takes over as we grow past these times of the procreation and lactation of our lives. We are gifted through the transitions of peri-menopause and menopause with the knowledge to sustain the lives we have created, to nurture the products of our creativity. However, it is beyond the means of simple survival, beyond the suckling of whomever we’ve agreed to care for. It is the next step. We are meant at this time to stir the cauldron of our own personal lives and use the magic we have at our disposal. You can attach meaning to those words of past connotations of witches and brews and black cats about. Or you can look deeper into the metaphor and see that the maturing energy of scorpio calls you to stir something. Stir the cauldron of your life. Allow yourself access to your great mystery and create something from it.

This time of life in which the very hormones of our bodies are transforming. It is not, I believe, a death but a ritual of transformation. And as it occurs so we become more sensitive. More sensitive to the movement of the world and the astrology that supports us. Let this Scorpio Sun transit draw you into its light. Spend some time with a ritual of power. The ritual of your power. The ritual of letting go of the woman you were for the last 40-50 years and be the woman that you are becoming for the next 40 or 50.

It can often feel to us as women that when the time of procreating and lactating (literally and figuratively of course) is over that we have completed our tasks. That this honorable place of growing life was our purpose for being here. Some do this physically and become mothers to children. Others find ways to fertilize and nurture the world around them. It is the very essence of women. AND yet the “crone”, a wise woman fully vested in her soul and spirit are far more POWERFUL than we would lead ourselves to believe. She is what the world is waiting for. Her wisdom needed now more than ever. Let your wise woman out and let yourself see what she is capable of. Her creations more alive than ever, her contributions making their mark.

What possibilities are in your magic pot?
What wisdom do you hold that its time to impart?

my secret to surviving menopause.

I discovered a powerful secret this weekend. If you are, like me, in the midst of menopause or other hormonal changes this secret might be important to you too.

These last two years have been quite a wave of changes. My body’s cycles are changing. My body temperature is changing, my ability to digest certain foods is changing and most of all I go through continuous cycles of change when it comes to how much energy I have available to me. I’ve even experienced high blood pressure at times. It’s been a journey of discovery as I try to adapt to these erratic changes and still have a normal life.

Normal life for me includes something called ecstatic dance. I have always been a dancer. My life and my growth have revolved around dance. Ecstatic dance is a process of moving through different rhythms that vary from slow, still or flowing to wild and chaotic and many places in between. The dance has always offered me a place to cleanse my soul, to heal my hurts, to express my creativity and embrace the unknown.

This weekend I attended a 5 Rhythms Wave workshop entitled Living Fully, Loving Deeply at a quaint little place downtown called the Portfolio Center with an amazingly beautiful teacher, Amara Pagano. I do these workshops a few times a year and always walk away knowing a bit more about myself. This was certainly no different. And yet…it was.

I have always been able to command my body to do what I wanted. I could toss myself about a dance floor with wild abandon and freedom of expression. I loved that about me because it gave my body a chance to release its inner woes and struggles and it provided me with insights and light and love in ways I could not get anywhere else. However, this weekend I was frustrated, my temperature was up, my blood pressure elevated, my hormones were rocking my world and I was constantly nauseous and feeling a bit dizzy. I kept pushing myself onto the dance floor tho in spite of my perceived limitations. It took several hours and much processing for the light to finally come on.

Here I was trying to find myself inside a wave of music with my own inner waves crashing against my shores. I kept trying to dance with my full self….after all…living fully and loving deeply as the workshop implied would require that from me…right? I would move through my limbs seeking fulfillment and expression and be met with limitation and resistance. Fortunately for me the teacher kept throwing us into situations to deal with our resistances. She would have us dance with them as if to tease them out of their dark places and shed light on them. She would set up scenarios for us to move through them as we saw the truth that lie within them. Or more clearly…the untruths…

The secret I discovered as I journeyed through my dance over the 14 hours spent on that dance floor was the secret of self acceptance. Not just to accept my conditions and limitations. Not to just simply say oh well…guess this is how it’s going to be from now on. Instead to dive deeply into a body full of resistance and discover who this women is.

This new woman. This 50 year old woman in this 50 year old body. Who is she? How might she dance? What expressions might she have? It was so much more than a surrender to my circumstances it was diving in to self discovery. Just how does she want to move? I found something quite amazing in that process, I found waves upon waves of self acceptance. And with that discovery an even bigger secret emerged… In those spaces of wild abandon on the many dance floors of my past there was this expression of my juiciness, my inner desires and collective waves of my emotions. I still found those available to me…but in such a different way. By slowing down within my experience, by giving attention to a new voice, a new movement, a new expression I found a part of me that was screaming to be set free. This wise and powerful woman demanded her place upon my life’s stage. Something in the shift, in the dance and the movement gave life to things lying dormant. My head cleared, maybe for the very first time. In fact my neck and head let go and moved more freely than ever before. My arms and legs found heights of movement that brought forth waves of emotion. I found myself crying tears of joy mixed with sadness over and over in the dance. Here she is. Me, this woman dancing as if she had never danced before. More alive in a way than the “maiden” that had poured her spirit out on to many, many dance floors.

So much is said about this transition of menopause. Collectively women seem to shun it and criticize its arrival. I can understand that. Its not much fun experiencing such a profound change. Its so much more than a body ceasing to bleed. Although unique I think for all of us there are those similar effects. Hot flashes, new aches and pains, changes in moods and desires. My experience has been challenging as well. Yet, in the midst of it I keep discovering the woman that I truly am. Past the hangups of my youth, accepting myself in my wisdom and character. Past the obsessions with what it looks like on the outside I can find a whole new world on the inside. A world ripe with clarity and passion and creativity that seemed unavailable to me before now. Although perceived, I’ve lost nothing. In fact, I’ve found something I’ve waited a lifetime to experience. ME.

I thank you Amara, I thank you Gabrielle, for the wisdom you bring me to keep recognizing myself in the dance. The teachers of this work, of this Wave, inspire me towards self acceptance. Thank you. May we meet upon many dance floors to come.

Saturn cycles, our only hope is to wake up.

There must be many blogs written today remembering, re-posturing, re-analysing the events of 91101. I was drawn to be one of them for reasons still to be known. It occurred to me today that it has been 7 years since this tragedy and a cycle has occurred. Every 7 years, Saturn and its transits represent the lessons we go through in order to grow up and mature into the fullness of our potential. Every 28 years we find ourselves in a new place in life, hopefully more mature and the wisdom to show for it. That is a Saturn cycle, it takes 28 years to complete and 360 degrees of an astrological wheel each quarter turn and halfway mark we culminate our lessons, we shift, change and grow. Not the out of the blue change like a Uranus cycle, but a slow and gradual one that took 7 year increments to resolve.

So, here we are 7 years, in astrology we call that a square, a transition of time that we are asked to take a look at ourselves and access our growth. What have we learned from our trials by the fires of 911? Are we any more awake? I was instantly impressed during the days following that event that apathy had crept back into its shallow dark corner. People began to talk and communicate with each other in a whole different way. The healing center I owned was saturated with people looking for hope of change and transition. We bonded together in prayer and envisioned a brighter future. I wonder….are we there yet?

I do believe that we have collectively opened our eyes but only just a bit. I do believe that we are more likely now than any other time in history capable of creating great change. That change however can be destructive or constructive depending on how awake we might choose to be. With so much power in our hands we have a few choices.

The awake choice: Forgiveness, Kindness, Sincerity, Acceptance, Self Love, Community and Conscious choice.

The in between choice: Belief proceeds experience and whatever you hold within your consciousness will manifest in your world. You hold blame, resentment, separation as the way the world is…then so it shall be. The eyes with which we judge each other are eyes half shut.

The choice found on the path of least resistance is the apathetic choice. OR rather no choice. Eyes closed. No change. Just keep accepting day by day the trials and tribulations of being human. Strive for more stuff and better job or the yearly vacation. No sense of a future past how to survive retirement and what pills to take.

Subsequently as we choose how to do our daily lives the lessons of Saturn continue to unfold. What was the ultimate lesson to learn here with such a vast loss of life? How many lives have we continued to lose as we fight a war supposedly designed to stop terrorism? If this is the first quarter turn of a life cycle what might the rest of it hold for us?

Stop for a moment and think about what you have learned in the last 7 years. How have you changed? Are you awake? Eyes half open? Asleep? I’m guessing you are not asleep or we wouldn’t have spent this much time together. Keep up the good work.

Capricorn / Cancer Full Moon – time to grow up…

The full moon, by nature is a quest for balance. In astrology it represents a literal 180 degree opposition in the wheel, In the heavens we know it by its brilliance in the sky. The light of the sun reflecting fully off the surface of this innately dark sphere, creating a balance between light and dark.

If your Sun is in Cancer or it is prominent in your chart emotional independance is one your major lessons. Family ties can remain entangled long after childhood. Becoming independent is usually a life long pursuit.

Capricorn’s steadfast mature persona is a reflection of our collective quest to be the grown up. To be responsible and serious. To be willing to work hard and to have success. To give of our value and make a difference in the world.

We all grow from the planetary shifts and changes. Or at least, we all have the same opportunity to grow. This moon has our inner children resolving the conflicts of being a grown up in an often challenging world. . Safety, love and approval are all part of those conflicts.

For me I awoke to a feeling of uneasiness. I had felt it coming up for days as I found myself plagued by emotions I can relate to as my inner child and there was an awful lot of chaos going on around me. Feelings were escalating. The morning of the full moon (it was full at 3 a.m. here in the East) the inner conflict was agonizingly persistant. Much like a child can incessantly nag to get your attention. I found myself feeling sad, thinking of my dead father, crying for unexplained reasons. I don’t usually feel sad about him or his death.

Because I had to “be in the world” and “be a grown up” going to work I knew I had to do something to help this poor kid. I asked for help from my spiritual resources and asked that this aspect of me be given love and support. I gave this child over to a higher level within me and instantly felt better. This helps me understand how much is happening on those levels all the time. This time I remembered to ask for help.

A few hours later I discovered my mother had fallen the night before and broke her hip while away on vacation. She’s 74. She would be having surgery and need rehab and of course support when she gets home.

For me, I look back to the new moon. It was my “birth moon” and it brought up a chance for me to heal some core issues I was born with. So, here we are culminating the lessons.

The transitions of Sun and Moon are themselves a dance. They are energies that bring about the lessons we need to grow. For me, a whole new way of being a child is becoming more evident every day. For now my mother no longer comforts me, she looks to me for care and support. Time to grow up a little bit more.

This full moon is certainly bringing me the challenge of how to love myself through this transition of life. Things are changing…

Fueling your life from your soul.

The second half of life comes with many changes. It’s important to move with those changes and through those changes to discover what you are really made of and why you are here. It is something I think about often and seek to find ways to be more in touch with what my soul yearns for.. I ask in meditation for the messages to be clear and I try to keep my eyes and ears alert to the whispers in my life.

When I was younger I knew there was a deep longing inside of me to express something. I didn’t know what and I really didn’t know how. I chose many avenues trying to find “it”, some were actually damaging to myself and to others. It seems during my younger years my soul could only find me through my pain. Painful relationships and difficult love issues continued to follow me around. I knew I wanted something more, something deep and soulful and I knew it was in me….somewhere… I also tried the opposite approach. I tried to search where I’d been taught, looking for god where I’d been told to find “him.” I searched for a place where I could feel the touch of light and somehow resolve this deep ache. I attempted several times to sit in churches and feel a connection to something more than me. I did. But I also walked away with some other things. Shame, despair, hopelessness…it seemed that this god that they spoke of wouldn’t approve of me or my life and certainly not my choices. The pain of life and the losses I had experienced were somehow my lot for something. Some evil wrong doing that I had done and was now being punished for.

I can tell you. My soul never ceased to show up for me in my pain. It was a knowing prescence that came to comfort me when things were bleak and dark. I danced around in that darkness and gave alot of power to the pain. Perhaps as a way to touch my soul the only way I knew how. As life would have it I did grow through the pain. I took those moments of soul growth and made the effort to find a better way.

The title of this post comes from a comment made by Dr. Christiana Northrup. She suggests that at this time of life it’s important to put to rest the past and to embrace a new Self. To prioritize what is really important. To, as she put it…fuel your life from your soul and less from the expectations of those around you.

What an exceptional way to see the process of maturity and wisdom. I share my “old” way because I know I’m not alone. Many of us spend a great deal of our life learning through pain. Through grief and suffering we make attempts to get to know this mysterious part of our being. I know that path well.

Several years ago I began to listen more carefully to that still quiet voice. At first I couldn’t hear it. There was nothing in there but static and some crazy voices telling me all the things i should be doing or chastising the things I hadn’t done. But eventually through persistence I separated the yama-yama of my lifetime psychosis from something that was much more supportive and loving. I found when I listened and responded to this voice I created a lot more love in my life. Things became more clear and sometimes I actually found myself responding to life from a much more soulful place. It produced a sense of peace and purpose.

Fueling your life from your soul requires the willingness to listen for that voice. To quite the chatter of the “choir” as I like to call it. Those inner voices that we’ve placed there as a means of survival. You know, the voice that sounds like your mother appropriately chiming in to remind you how you SHOULD handle something, or that task master cracking the whip to drive and motivate, the shaming voice that is somehow suppose to help us make the right choices…the many voices that make up the ego’s perspective on life. The voice of the soul is a softer, quieter voice. It doesn’t blame, or put down or load you down with shoulda’s and coulda’s and why haven’t you….. it’s the voice that nudges you towards light and love when you let it. It will come sit with you in the darkness, but my experience has taught me… there’s so much more to learn from it when you meet it in the light.

Finding grace when you can’t even find clean underwear.

Lisa McLeod is a bright and funny woman. She speaks with a voice for the american woman and shares that voice in newspaper colums, books and even an insightful blog as the voice of Women for Obama.

Her newest book is “Finding Grace when you can’t even find clean underwear.” We need to laugh at ourselves in unison to this. Yes, what a challenge it is to be present with our zen-ness, our one-ness and maintain peace with all of creation when there’s the reality of life.

Our congratulations and good wishes go to Lisa, we honor your spirit. We appreciate that you are reaching women with your beautiful sense of humor. It inspires the voice in the rest of us.